I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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