I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize