I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize