I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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