Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize