Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize