That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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