I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
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