I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
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i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
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Im just a social blackout drinker.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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