i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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