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i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Randomize
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