u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize