We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
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I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
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He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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