Are we in a gay sports bar?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
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She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
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"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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