just tell him i said nine months
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize