HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
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