It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize