Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize