My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Randomize