so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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