i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize