I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize