If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize