I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
You can't special order awesome
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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