Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize