Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
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There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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