So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize