i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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