dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize