dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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