I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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