the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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