my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize