i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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