it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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