i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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