I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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