Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
PS: I just woke up from my shower
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I think i got beer on your cat.
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