btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
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