Me. At least after what I've been through.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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