The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
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