Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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