all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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