You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize