I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Barsexuality is the new black.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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