Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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