and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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