I like to think it a success when the cops are called
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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