is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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