My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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